Below are two versions of what I wrote for a writing prompt challenge that I participated in September of last year.
1st Attempt at ‘Quiet’
Desolation.
The street light flickered and I knew another wave was coming. Of what I wasn’t quite sure and in the window seat I slid down a little further and clutched Knubby a bit closer. I did it as if to shield her or attempt to protect myself, I am still unsure of which.
2nd Attempt at ‘Quiet’
The fridge buzzed as if letting me know it was doing its job. It made a show of keeping everything cold. The humming picked up as I turned and eyed the appliance. She was defiant letting me know that she wouldn’t be bullied into being quiet-silent.
Silent.
That word rattled around in my head long after I had lain down in my twin bed for the night.
She wasn’t like me at a loss for words always grasping at syllables and frantically attempting to string them together.
Words. Little things that conveyed thoughts and emotions. I was desperate to let someone know mine and yet I was at a loss.
I liked both versions but I preferred the first one. It conveys the concept in a very few words and is very evocative.
I’m glad you enjoyed it. Thank you.